It is interesting how we sift through the days of our lives – the highs, the lows, the big days, the days of fear, of wondrously beautiful belief, of doubt… and how we try to find the real answers to what it’s really all about. We think we know, and then when things get rough, we begin to wonder…
Today.. and for the last few days, my fears were heightened, my concerns were real. And what did I become, amidst this time of trouble? Was I the person I had hoped I was? Was I the person of faith, one who believed? Or did I let my fear and my doubt bring me to a place where I’d hoped I wouldn’t be?
Do I ask too much of myself to even question? As humans, we are all vulnerable to fear… This is what I tell myself.
For me, the fear has dissipated now. The scare is over. Life has returned to normal and I am most thankful.
But I have to wonder… if the object of my fear had become reality, how would I have coped? How would I have dealt with a terrible new reality?
I think about all of the wonderful, beautiful people in this world who face new difficult challenges every day, whose scare is not over, whose lives are not normal… who believe, and fight, and love, and give of themselves every day. These are the heroes. These are the people, who just like any of us, had a normal every day kind of day turn into a time of fear.. a terrible new reality. But somehow, they found the strength and courage to carry on.. to fight and believe.
And so I can only hope that when and if I face the fear again, I will be of this strength, this substance. I pray that I shall always remember my great joy in learning good news, but that I shall also remember how easily it could have been bad news… For every day, as we move forward, we face times of uncertainty and danger… we face times of fear and doubt. Oh, but yes, we also face the times of joy and wonder! And it is how we keep our faith and our belief alive in both the good times and the bad that defines us as people and as believers.

~ Carole Carter – words and photograph